The NEW Pledge of Allegiance

I pledge allegiance to my Creator

who is the maker of heaven and earth

and for the grace that He so freely gives-

the whole world, loved by God, all powerful

with freedom and forgiveness for all.

A Modern Day Psalm!

Keep me safe O' God
from those I thought would!
Keep me grounded in You
as the Earth below me shakes.
Keep me stable, as the ones
around me, aren't.
Keep me and hide me in Your
Word and heart--
Call my name and I will come to You.
Keep me as a light, as there
is darkness all around--
hold me
sanctify me to You
beckon me
save me
Keep me safe as I have
been in danger--
Show me who I really am-
Who You created, not who I think I am!
Send forth Your Spirit
so I can live in and through Your Almighty power,
and by Your beautiful grace
and Your wonderful mercy!
You are all there is to hope for,
seek after,
hunger and thirst for in this life.
Help me not to make idols out of things
or people around me. You are the quencher,
the satisfier, the peace holder.
In You I trust no matter what! My eyes and ears are open to You Lord!
I know You are with me and will not leave me.
I am Yours! I am confident of Your love,
I am planted in Your Truth.
Keep it near as it is shoes to my feet,
food to my stomach
and relief to my pain!
Keep Your eye on me--
clear me a path that leads to YOUR ways--I am desperate for it.
Along the way, rid my mind, soul and body of all that is not Yours--
All that does not belong in my life, take everything I've picked up along the way
that doesn't align with You, grab all that is not what You created!
Get me down to bare bones if You must!
I am willing--
I am ready
no matter the cost,
because who You are and what You did is costly,
even though it is freely given.
Take the things I might not even see yet,
I don't want to claim anything that doesn't belong to ME,
or anything You didn't GIVE me--I know and believe that is not
who I really am-
make me who I truly am.
Only all that is YOU--keep that.
I praise Your name high and low-
and thank you for my freedom!
May glory be Yours throughout my days,
and may honor be given through out my weeks to You--
the Only One--forever and ever! I praise Your heavenly name!
AMEN!

What Are We Doing?

When we are asked to become like Jesus and live how He did, and imitate Him, in our mind of minds, how are we thinking we are going to do that? I know how technically, having a relationship with Him, reading His Word, praying, being alone with God. Any spiritual discipline you can think of. But I'm not talking about that.

What did Jesus do? RIGHT? Isn't that the question?

He was in RELATIONSHIPS. His whole Ministry was based on relationships He had with people. He couldn't be who He was alone, could He? He of course had His alone time, and we need that too, but the very basis of Jesus' life was lived WITH PEOPLE.
We know too that we are to have Community in the body of believers. Paul talks about this relentlessly. I think if we thought in "smaller" terms first, we would be more successful at this, and the lack of community wouldn't plaque us the way it does. It wouldn't seem so difficult to attain.

We won't be able TO LIVE OUT our life in Christ if we aren't doing relationship with others. First our spouse, then our children if we have them, and then other believers and friends. And also the needy, the poor, and with the widow.

No it's not easy to maintain relationships, we have jobs, we have homes to maintain, we have everyday modern day demands. But why not back up a little bit and focus on having relationships and nurturing them? Giving us a CHANCE to BE Jesus to people and to live out who we are IN HIM. How are we suppose to be imitating Christ if we aren't in relationship with others?

What can we do to find relationships? Wait until we "connect" with someone or have chemistry with them? I use to think so. But not so much anymore. I think we need to make an effort to get involved somewhere in the church, or reach out to someone personally. There are opportunities everywhere, we just aren't making the time!

If you want to follower Jesus and consider yourself a disciple, well then do what He did, get into relationships with people, so you can imitate Him, and put all you've learned, all the ways you've grown. Show the world your fruit.

We can not live with the confines of ourselves, that is the fasted way to destruction. It might seem easier to live that way, but it simply is not. There is no way you can be like Christ and not be in relationships with people.

To My Anonymous Follower

Thank you for encouraging me to write more/again! You were the inspiration for me to be able to write this article!

Where Do I Fit In?

When I had my Hysterectomy 2 and a half years ago it was one of the toughest, saddest, depressing things I had ever gone through. I think it was such a Roller Coaster for so many reasons. I mean come on, I was like 33 years old. For any women that go through something so "unnatural" like that under the age of maybe 40, it's devastating.

Not only do you not have a choice to lose a bunch of Organs, but many other choices that you ought to still have in your "youth" as a woman are taken from you. Things like HORMONES, hello!

The chances of more children, or in some cases no children.

(I always new when I got pregnant so young that I'd look back and no why, and it would all make sense).

You sort of get your "womanhood" stripped away from you. I admit that I didn't feel like a woman when I woke up from that surgery. I had been laced with HRT (hormone replacement therapy), and for months and months was miserable from going through surgical menopause. It was so not fun. After about 6 months of sleeping pills and messing around with different HRT's and doses, I was finally feeling like a woman again, and feeling like myself.

I haven't since entered "the real world", I haven't been able to work due to another major surgery I had, so I spend most of my time in my home. But I have gotten out. In the last 2 years in mingling with other women, and being out "there", I noticed myself asking the same question over and over, "Where do I fit in?"

If I'd be chatting with women my age or there in around my age, they'd always end up talking about having more kids, or their current little ones (mine is 15 and I'm 35). Or there would be times they'd complain about how they had bad cramps or they were bloated from their period. Stuff like that, and automatically, it was like I couldn't relate anymore. Many emotions flooded my soul: "I'd love to get my period, if it meant I hadn't had my Hysterectomy, I'd feel more like a woman"; or rude things like "Quit your complaining, you can have kids still and you didn't have your female organs taken from you." Just crap like that I'd be thinking. It's like I just couldn't join in on the conversation, but yet I was their age!

But then there are times when I am around "older" women, 50 and up, and of course, the subject of Menopause always gets brought up while they are complaining about Hot Flashes and continuing on and on about it. And automatically they'd get all short and snotty with me like, "Well, you have no idea what we're talking about yet, you're so young, but just wait."

Stuff like that! And I'd be all, "Well, actually......"

I just sort of felt lost. I mean I'd always felt a sense of "awkward belonging" already because most girls my age don't have kids the age my daughter is; most of them have little kids, so that already would sort of work against me in feeling socially awkward with other women. So the Menopause thing just added to it!

I'm an odd ball 35 year old who has gone through Menopause and I have a Teenager, where or where do I fit in?!

Finally I realized that I could fit in with both, regardless of my overpowering emotions of feeling like I fit in with neither! I could zoom out, and not be so tight closed in on the facts and how my facts and reality were affecting me. I could zoom out and realize that I still could relate to the "young" women because I'd been there, done that. And instead of having the rude, harmful thoughts I would have in my head about those women, I could resist those thoughts, and jump in and make the best of it, and maybe even joke about it (ok, forget the joking).

I could be more open minded about it and hey, I could even be a minister to younger women who might go through the same thing, or the women that will be in my life when they go through it naturally, I can help them because I already went through it!

And as far as the "older" women, I could have fun with them, and not be so worried about if I fit in or not with them either, I could hold my own with some older mature women, and they'd probably be interested in my story! And it might help their self esteem knowing that a young woman like me is in the same boat as them. It can be a win win, if I make it a win win.

Dealing with it the way I was before, was just eating me alive; I felt sorry for myself, and I was angry, and didn't think it was fair. Well, that is true, it isn't fair, but most things in life that happen are not "fair." I knew I had to figure out a new way to handle myself with my brand new situation, and I'm so glad I found a new way, because now I can fit in with anyone!